New soul

We welcomed a new soul into the family today, My brother's

daughter, we decided on when to bring her into the cold

November world, as it was a C-section.

We all were ready to welcome the baby, as planned,

But the baby being a Girl Child was a SURPRISE,

(Sex determination is illegal in India)

To me a really sweet one, To me

SHE is the BEST BABY in the WHOLE Universe.

But When I called some of my aunts, uncles and

extended family to inform about the wonderful news, their reactions

taught me 2 major things about them.

1. How narrow minded they are.

2. How they are stuck in "once upon a time" .

My crazy family I love them all nevertheless... But today somehow I was feeling very judgmental

and despised some of their comments specially the ones like

"it's OK lets hope the next time It is a boy",

"Oh my god we got to ask Gopi to go the temples to pray for a boy the next time" .

I was thinking what is this ?? BUT aren't we 2009 now and

aren't we living the times where they say equality and all that spiel ??

Such a Bitter sweet day today, Sweet as I enjoyed spending the day with my little niece

who sneezed on my right cheek and Pee'ed on my right palm, burped on my shoulder

after I fed her with FIVE spoons of milk... Whoa WHAT an awesome AWESOME DAY.

Bitter as I learnt How my family is still stuck somewhere in 1870's and

have to catch with current times.

I only hope that I will have enough courage to speak up and

shut them the next time we welcome another Daughter.

In between Times !!!

When you ask water cascading freely off of a water fall if it fits well in a beautiful porcelain bowl or in a pot to serve a hardworking family ? Wonder what the answer would be...

The house is being packed away and I feel like my skin is being taken off me...

Pot luck @ Parents in law

I get so tensed up when I have to cook something for my in laws, as I have this strong desire to please them, and they are never pleased with me, but I know I'll die trying but won't give up...

Well now that it's said; My Mom in law asked me to make Donda kaya fry and said it has to be sans onion or garlic... (Ahem... That is Brahmin's festival special)

So I frantically called Mom, and asked her to give me a Donda kaya fry recipe with no onion or garlic, there was a second's SILENCE on the other end of the line, after which I heard my Mom go into a fit of laughter and (I didn't know what amused her so much) after she recovered from her bouts of laughter she gave me this recipe.

For approximately 10 people.

Ingredients

1. Donda kaya

2. Kopra (just a small piece)

3. Thil ( half a table spoon full)

4. Pea-nuts (about 10 to 15)

5. Dhaniya (a table spoon full)

6. Green chillies ( 3 )

7. Kothimeer (one bunch)

8. Salt (Not too much)

9. Red chilli powder (Depending on the spice quotient of the family)

10. Thoda sa pyaar and now on to

Modus Operandi

Pre preparation

Slice Donda kayas into 4 keeping the whole intact, and boil (its always good to boil the veggies for making a fry curry, that way they won't take too much oil in when fried.)

Dry roast Kopra, thil, Pea-nuts, dhaniya and powder them in a mixer (make sure that the powder is dry)

Preparation

Light the stove put a Kadia on fire and put some oil in it (Remember though its fry the veggies are boiled so not much oil is required, the maximum is 2 table spoons full of oil) and put mustard seeds and that white daal, now put the boiled DK's and cover it with a plate ( my grand mom and my mom always pour water into the plate that's used as a lid, So I do too) you can too if you want... let it cook a bit, add salt and red chilli powder, cover it with that water containing lid, after 2 minutes add the powder, let it cook/fry whatever for an other 2 minutes and garnish with Kothimeer.

Post Preparation

Pray that in laws will be pleased with the result.

I have got the theory part well but tomorrow morning I hope that it comes out as it should when I make it amidst all the chaos, of convincing A to go to my parents for the early morning rituals and then to my grand mom, for the same ritual repeat... SIGH and then get to A's parents by 11 30 am.

Will put up a photo of the preparation and Comments critics and reactions on the curry here later tomorrow along with the reason why mom laughed. I forgot to ask her that as I was too concentrated on taking the recipe...

I wish me all the very best, and Wish you all a VERY HAPPY DIWALI :D

Spiel on Auto-walas

If any of you approached an auto guy in the last week in the Tank-bund area, you would have noticed how they proposition to take you to Moti bazar (pearl market) first and then to where ever you want to go and that too on METER price.

It came as such a surprise to me, especially because they demand extra money even if its required for them to take a U-Turn or a galli (a small lane) little away from the main road. So I asked an auto-wala on what was happening and he announces with a glee that the pearl shop owners give them 20 rupees for every customer who just walks in to the shop, a sweet box for every purchase and a sweet box along with a shirt and trousers for every 5 purchasers.

I really don't understand if this is for good or not but it felt Super incorrect to me, It was raining cats and dogs I was dead hungry and all I wanted to do was get to a warm dry place and calm the rats in my belly. To me at that vulnerable state the auto guy looked almost devilish, he knew my weakness and he gave me an option, I either go straight to where I had to go for a 30 extra rupees or I go to Moti Bazar first before he dropped me off for meter price. Maybe if it was not 10 pm and if I was not fully drenched in the rain shivering and hungry maybe I would have complied. BUT It was a Different story then.

I was thinking ohh Thank god for here is an other woe added to the already existing list of tribulations. As the saying goes; there were million reasons for Karna's death and there are equal number of reasons for the auto-men to turn street rakshasas.

I just wish all the westerners in Hyderabad a very good luck not just with the demanding auto-men, but also the looters who instructed the auto guys to bring the victims to their pearl lairs so even they can loot them in leisure.

The auto scene is becoming from bad to worse, I just forgot to see an Auto-man as an other human being. He looks at me like I was a walking talking "Rupee-Note" and I look at him as a hungry Vampire who feeds on my money.

SAD BUT TRUE What to do ?

Snippets From My head...

I like my house to be lit like on a stage, Lights where I am and the rest of the house to be Dark... So I feel the Spot light on me all the time...

HOME

I watched an awesome Documentary not so long ago called Home, and my today's talk with a friend kicked all the thoughts I had parked in my head while watching the Docu to the foreground and I see very clearly what Home really means...

If words could ware off then the phrase "Home is where the heart is" will be so worn out, yet I would like to remember the phrase once again to remind me what HOME really is for us Human beings. (I wonder where Homo erectus before turning into Homo sapiens felt most at home... probably where his food went).

I understand that home can mean different things to different species and to us its not just a place where the basic needs are addressed. It is the place that sets a platform to our future growth, a foundation where we learn to understand our strengths and weaknesses along with being linked to our family. Home also implies food, language, weather, clothing, as well as geographical features such as mountains beaches volcanoes and many others my over crowded brain can't think of right now.

Both me and A are not so at Home in either of our parents houses because of the simple fact that we can't be ourselves to be able to let our guards down, and be totally accepted... Well anyways thats a whole different chapter, as the complexity of what Home with family is too dense.

Even though Home is where we feel like we belong, not constantly feel like an outsider is Home just a community we once lived in ??? or the country that is our dream destination ??? Or is it just that feeling we carry within ourselves??? is it always a place where you feel at Home ??? I feel a sense of belonging and at Home with people too... Will that feeling remain with me if I recreate same surroundings and take the same people I love with me and resettle in say for example US ???
I don't know...

World didn't remain a simple place to understand simple things and have simple choices. Law of nature is that we undergo transformations that may require us to uproot ourselves from the actual situation to migrate to live in different circumstances.

The shock of contradictions brought forth by the new place may push us into a state of discomfort questioning everything about the very foundations we may have come to depend on... But does it always mean that we are losing something ??? why can't it be relearning a different way to be ? Do things ?

an alternate answer to the same question... before we fashion new memories, acquire new friends and warm the new abode in order to feel at home, it is a necessary change to become like a tree that gives shelter for the birds to build their nests in, to become and be the home we search for... it is merely a matter of staying grounded and centered, allowing and recognizing that the pleasures we enjoyed in one place will still touch our hearts in another.

As Earth our bed Sky as the shelter and nature as our sibling, Home is Everywhere... Wherever we are... Home is a place that you can leave behind with a detachment of a bird and care of a man who hopes that the place left behind by us will protect an other needy.

I just wish that You make peace with yourself and your surroundings to feel at Home in India in America or even in Timbuktu.